Every year, without fail, and generally more than once, this time of year rings my heart. Without fail. I felt like I was getting off easy this year. I haven't shed a tear. But tonight I cried enough for all of December and into the new year.
One of my great pleasures in the evening is listening to music on YouTube. I've got some favorites and I listen to those and other times I just follow an idea. Tonight was the latter. I found Bing Crosby singing "White Christmas" and kept on with Bing Crosby. This led me to the original trailer for "Bells of St. Mary's" -- one of my all time favorites -- and then to "Going My Way." I pushed the video for "Toora Loora Loora," the Irish lullabye and before I knew tears were streaming down my face. I was in our living room in Hartford watching "Going My Way" with my parents on the old black and white console tv. My father was in his blue recliner and my mother on the couch, with the brown cover. It's at least 45 years since we all watched this together and my father has been gone almost thirty years, but I could see it clearly and missed those winter nights so much.
I know I am so blessed to have had parents for whom the idea of a great evening was all of us together watching a movie. And that is why I miss them so much, especially at this season. Penniwig asked this morning what are our favorite things and the first on my list was family and friends. It was an easy answer and so true, and so painful when they are no longer with us.
So bless you and keep you, my friends. Here's wishing you nights of quiet happiness with those you love best, now and all through the year.